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If college were really like it is at the fictitious U. of New York on "Felicity" …

  • Dorm rooms would be as big as most apartments.

  • Your parents could cut you off financially and you could still make enough money to pay for your education just by working at Dean & Deluca.

  • Getting a job in the financial aid department would give you immediate access to all student applications and records.

  • If you told your roommate you were broke, they wouldn't charge you rent anymore. And your significant other could move in to the apartment for free, too.

  • You could lie on your college application and not get caught.

  • Cafeterias would look more like restaurants, and students would hang out there for hours on end.

  • You would know everyone at school within a few days and you'd bump into them all the time.

  • Dorm fire alarms would go off just when you're about to lose your virginity.

  • Dorm rooms would come equipped with hibachi grills.

  • Guys would draw a portrait of a girl just to get a date.

  • Registering for classes would involve milling around a small room. Nobobdy would register by phone or online.

  • Dating your RA would do you absolutely no good in getting a change of roommates.

  • Guys would go out with a girl for months without getting any action and that would be okay with them.

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